As comedians, we are all laughing because life is so horrible. Life is so difficult,

and I cope with it by making jokes about absolutely everything.
Joan Rivers

I like to look for patterns in science and life. It's what I do.
Patrick Soon-Shiong

Posturing is funny to me.
Casey Wilson

I like editing. Generally, you work under the assumption that everything can be shorter. I like to see if I can reconstruct a sentence. I find that enjoyable work.
Sheldon Harnick

My first job as premier will be to go back to basics.
Lara Giddings

Nothing happens in any legislative body that's not purposeful.
Dan Webster

If you like being battered, the work of Savion Glover - one-time child prodigy - should be up your alley. I don't, and it isn't up mine.
Robert Gottlieb

I would love to have written Roger Zelazny's first five books of 'Amber.' What a great idea he had about the shadings of reality!
Carol Berg

Some people use stand-up to get something else in their careers, but it's truly the art form of stand-up I love.
Judy Gold

My policy in America is, 'Steady growth is forever.'
Anthony Pratt

Web sites are designed to keep young people from using the keyboard, except to enter in their parents' credit card information.
Douglas Rushkoff

Gemeoss

When I was 17, I worked in a mentoring program in Harlem designed to improve

the community. That's when I first gained an appreciation of the Harlem Renaissance, a time when African-Americans rose to prominence in American culture. For the first time, they were taken seriously as artists, musicians, writers, athletes, and as political thinkers. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar I only make movies that are interesting to me. Brian Grazer I wouldn't say I was organised at all. I just have to prioritise. Is it more important for them to be organised, or to have their dinner, do you know what I mean? Jo Brand The courage in journalism is sticking up for the unpopular, not the popular. Geraldo Rivera A happy life must be to a great extent a quiet life, for it is only in an atmosphere of quiet that true joy dare live. Bertrand Russell I think Mick Jagger would be astounded and amazed if he realized that to many people he is not a sex symbol, but a mother image. David Bowie I enjoy my job as long as I can create a character, otherwise it's boring. Jav

That's what I think our jobs as parents are, to educate as much as possible...

I tell them to follow their bliss. The people who follow their bliss in this world tend to be the more happier people. Art Alexakis The only time I waste is time I spend doing something that, in my gut, I know I shouldn't. If I choose to spend time playing video games or sleeping in, then it's time well spent, because I chose to do it. I did it for a reason - to relax, to decompress or to feel good, and that was what I wanted to do. Simon Sinek Meat workers may have been looked down upon socially, but at least they were well-paid and were a fit and lively bunch as a result of hard, honest physical work. Michael Leunig I decided that I wanted a farm back in 1940 when I was with the Dodgers. I tried to find one within commuting distance of New York. Larry MacPhail Oh God, are you supposed to collect things? I don't collect things. I like throwing things away. Caitlin Moran My first phone was two tin cans tied together with string, and it worked pretty good. Do

It had to happen to me sometime: sooner or later, I would have to lose

sight of the cutting edge. That moment every technical person fears - the fall into knowledge exhaustion, obsolescence, techno-fuddy-duddyism - there was no reason to think I could escape it forever. Ellen Ullman Innovation and its allure can be dangerous. It can draw you away from the user, from the intended outcome, and may be the ultimate demise of otherwise great intentions. Mark Brand My voice is different, but I don't think I'm the only one with a different take on pop music. Charli XCX In South Africa, we drive on the left-hand side, and most of the cars are standard, so I learned with a full-gear transmission with a clutch and hill starts. I've never driven an automatic until I came to Canada. Jodi Balfour Mexico has 44 treaties with other countries that make it very advantageous to do international shipping from Mexico rather than from the United States. Wilbur Ross Winning HOYS set me up for the future and prepared me for riding in front of lots of

Given Pounds and five years, and an ordinary man can in the ordinary course, without

any undue haste or putting any pressure upon his taste, surround himself with books, all in his own language, and thence forward have at least one place in the world. Augustine Birrell Everyone should know that most cancer research is largely a fraud, and that the major cancer research organizations are derelict in their duties to the people who support them. Linus Pauling A Bush Administration will, I believe, enjoy a better relationship with the new Congress, although President-elect Bush will be faced with real challenges in getting along with the Congress. Richard V. Allen I once thought that I was the only man that persevered to be the friend of the white man, but since they have come and cleaned out our lodges, horses, and everything else, it is hard for to believe the white man any more. Black Kettle When you finish a poem, it clicks shut like the top of a jewel box, but prose is endless. I haven't experienced an awful lot of clicking shut! Kenneth Koch I thin

As a Midlander and a big walker, I'd always loved ridge and furrow

fields, the plough-marked land as it was when it was enclosed. It is the landscape giving you a story of lives that ended with the arrival of sheep. Jim Crace I think it's really rare to see women on television who are brilliant, selfish, vain, fallible - and I feel like I have all those capacities in myself, so it's good to see people in the media representing all of those things. Kerry Bishe I never went after fame. It fell into my lap. Caitlyn Jenner My mom and dad were actors when they were younger and had a horrible experience of it. My dad became a literary agent and my mom a casting director. Daniel Radcliffe I have this idea of trying to catalog all the genes on the planet. Craig Venter The wind from the Kingdom of Heaven has blown all over the world, and shall blow for centuries yet. George William Russell I always said if I played a drag queen, I'd want to create a template with the realness they talk about in 'Paris Is Burning.' Billy P

Napoleon's plan was for his army to arrive in Egypt not as conquerors but liberators.

Landing in Aboukir Bay on July 1, 1798, the French captured Alexandria the next day, overcoming the surprised Mamelukes - the despotic local rulers - with a combination of modern artillery and infantry tactics.Tom Reiss We have not argued in either Brazil or Argentina that the IMF should step in to protect the banks.Charles Dallara I always did what I thought was interesting. I always just did what caught my fantasy. Looking like a woman, that was never the criteria for me. It was always to do drag. And drag is not gender-specific. Drag is just drag. It's exaggeration.RuPaul I always like to read something romantic about the place I'm visiting.Anouska Hempel The support we received at OneRiot from the beginning has been amazing. Everyone's door was open, and everyone was rooting for our success. In turn, our team at OneRiot has done everything we can to return the favor.Kimbal Musk If I tell you there's cheese on the moon, bring the crackers.Tyronn Lue

You can't do anything if a person says no. In such a case, there's nothing

you can do - unlike the popular cliche that pressure is exerted, or that maybe an unwilling source is done away with. Markus Wolf Men in general are quick to believe that which they wish to be true. Julius Caesar If you start to think of your physical and moral condition, you usually find that you are sick. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Self-respect: the secure feeling that no one, as yet, is suspicious. H. L. Mencken The city is not a concrete jungle, it is a human zoo. Desmond Morris At times it is folly to hasten at other times, to delay. The wise do everything in its proper time. Ovid I have no inflated ideas about success anyway. Trevor Dunn

We use our land for hunting, fishing, hiking, and to create jobs. Our outdoor

economy is a billion dollar economic engine for the state that creates jobs. Ryan Zinke Success can be as simple as the warm feeling you get when you smile at a stranger, someone you know must be lonely, and having that stranger return your smile. It can be the bringing of a child into the world and raising that child to be a good man or woman. Maryanne Trump Barry To be in an Intercontinental title match at WrestleMania, that is the stuff dreams are made of. Dean Ambrose I've learnt to be happy by myself. Missy Elliott I am thrilled to be dame. It's one of those - the fact that you have been honored by your country is what it's all about, and it just feels good right there. Julie Andrews I was in the National Academy of Fine Arts and Design, on a scholarship. I was - still am - an artist. They were looking for an actor for 'Take a Giant Step,' and a producer liked my look and asked if I could act. I said, 'Yep!' Then I got into acting more or less just to

There is nothing on earth so easy as to forget, if a person chooses to

set about it. I'm sure I have as much forgot your poor, dear uncle, as if he had never existed; and I thought it my duty to do so. Richard Brinsley Sheridan Regaining the Champions Cup is not going to be easy. Luis Figo I think anyone would want to see their favorite band in a small club over a large stadium. Bill Wyman I'm told leather drives men up the wall. I like wearing it because it because it feels nice. Honor Blackman There lives more faith in honest doubt, believe me, than in half the creeds. Alfred Lord Tennyson The trouble with baseball is that it is not played the year round. Gaylord Perry The luxury of our position now is that we can almost assemble any team to address any issue. Rem Koolhaas

When I did 'Bird,' it was a surprise to some people, first because I wasn't

in it and second because most of the films I'd been doing were cop movies or westerns or adventure films, so to be doing one about Charlie Parker, who was a great influence on American music, was a great thrill for me. Clint Eastwood Thirty percent of Americans have German blood in their family. I don't see any major difference in the engineering abilities of Americans and Germans. Hasso Plattner What I really want out of life is to discover something new: something mankind didn't know was possible to do. Elizabeth Holmes I don't really like being with people my own age for long periods, because all we talk about is our decrepitude, how the world is changing for the worse even though it isn't. Ian Mckellen You don't know what people are looking for. What you know is what you feel like might be missing. It's up to the people to agree with you or disagree with you, and you'll know in their reaction. Pharrell Williams I'm obsessed by Inst