Comedians, we're just people who whine. But we happen to be funny when we whine.

Like, if Jerry Seinfeld wasn't funny, you'd want to punch him in the face; he'd just seem like a whiner to you. But the fact is that he's funny.
Artie Lange

Customers who have to come back and spend, or customers who just don't want the hassle of leaving - those are the ones who are most worth attracting.
Margaret Heffernan

My approach to the work is the same, whether I had the lead or a supporting role. I consider myself a character actor in the true sense of the word. Unless I'm doing my autobiography, I'm playing a character.
Ving Rhames

What is our destiny? Does it matter? Is it bound up with 'our' planet? In my opinion, yes.
Roy Harper

Weird, but sometimes I feel more like my cartoon character than I do Lizzie because she's a little more edgy and snappy.
Hilary Duff

I always wished for this, but it's almost turning into more of a nightmare than a dream.
Eminem

Each song is a lifetime, it begins and ends, and there's a journey taken within the songs.
Leif Garrett

The iPhone calendar isn't bad, but it isn't great, either. It only offers a day view and a month view - it doesn't have a week view, which drives me crazy.
Susan Orlean

Twins are usually hailed with delight, because they swell the power of the family, though in some instances they are put to death.
John Hanning Speke

I used to live in Ethiopia as a child, and I lived there when Haile Selassie was the emperor.
Jack Kingston

Gemeoss

Urban Outfitters - I love it. It's almost like Forever 21, but for, like, the

24- to 25-year-old girl, getting a little bit older. Keke Palmer I'm the kind of person that believes that I would like to be evaluated by my entire career and my entire life, not two words that I would misspeak and then later apologize for. Kirk Cameron I often feel a discomfort, a kind of embarrassment, when I explain elementary-particle physics to laypeople. It all seems so arbitrary - the ridiculous collection of fundamental particles, the lack of pattern to their masses. Leonard Susskind Around age 11 or 12, I started playing jazz bass. From there, I went to electric bass and then guitar, which I kept up for a long time. Joshua Roman Space X's Elon Musk wants to colonize Mars with modules where earthlings can live. My teleporting technology is the number one way those individuals will get new information, new treatments of diseases that will occur on the planet, and new food sources. Craig Venter Brain cells are normally not sensitive to light. So by introdu...

In the next couple of years, part of every film's process is going to be

to adjust the images. And it'll be to change the color of an actor's tie or change the little smirky thing he's doing with his mouth. Or you can put in more clouds or move the tree a little bit. Robert Zemeckis There's a high school in Camden, New Jersey, I call the Jill Scott School. It's the Camden Creative Arts High School. Those teachers and kids are so passionate about what they do, and 98 percent of the senior class went on to college. Jill Scott I spent a good deal of time going back over my childhood, my midlife, to try to understand who I was. We're supposed to be complete and whole, and you can't be whole if you're trying to be perfect. Doing a life review helped me get over the disease to please. Jane Fonda For over a year I continued to submit mss, and have them rejected - the last few with rejection letters indicated the story was pretty good, but I was American. Nora Roberts Well, you know I have an office, my film offices. So I...

I would say that the study of history is that which gives man the greatest

optimism, for if man were not destined by his Maker to go on until the Kingdom of Heaven is attained, man would have been extinguished long ago by reason of all man's mistakes and frailties. Douglas Southall Freeman Being attacked by right-wing Christians did not bother me. Being attacked by liberal feminists did. Hugh Hefner I think the gay community should get smart and drop the word 'marriage.' Do you really need to change every right-wing Christian to make sure you get your equal rights? Eyes on the prize, we should be sticking to getting equal rights. Ani DiFranco 'Drive' is a genre piece, and a lot of times we don't get really sophisticated genre films. Oscar Isaac I always want the last line to be really good, which may sound silly, but I want it to be a last pleasing line. Elizabeth McCracken I love the way little kids dress themselves! They're completely carefree about how others perceive them. Gillian Zinser I think it's a mis...

Web searching and cellphone use both flourish in the wee hours. Before the dawn of

the web, I would stay up watching television. But there is something soporific about television: I would often nod off. Not so when I'm online. As technologies expand, these problems may only worsen. Sendhil Mullainathan To our critical eyes, the threads of which the past is woven are, by nature, endless and indivisible. Scientifically speaking, we cannot grasp the absolute beginning of anything: everything extends backwards to be prolonged by something else. Pierre Teilhard de Chardin I'm the kind of person who likes to create the environment and mindset - not because I do it deliberately, but because that's how I like to live - where, from catering to makeup to hair to wardrobe, electricians, camera department lighting, sound, you know, it's our movie; we're together, and we have that camaraderie and that closeness. Steven Rodney McQueen There are examples of fraternal dictatorships, or one, anyway: the passing of power from Fidel to Raul Castro. Elliott...

What makes America great was a government that was founded to be limited to doing

one thing. I really believe the whole purpose of America, the aspirational value - why everybody who wants to come to this country wants to come here - was because we respected the dignity of every living person. Rick Santorum We have to get control of our borders. You can only do that if you make companies obey the law and not hire undocumented or illegals. They can only do that is if they have a Social Security Card that has biometrics so they know whether the person is legal or not. Michael Bloomberg Faulkner turned out to be a great teacher. When a student asked a question ineptly, he answered the question with what the student had really wanted to know. Leslie Fiedler If you ask me why I've succeeded, it's because I was in the Royal Marines. You have this unbelievable sense of achievement and of overcoming adversity. That's the confidence it breeds. Brian McDermott I don't really plan to be a pop star; I just want to be able to make music without the wh...

IBM's long-standing mantra is 'Think.' What has always made IBM a fascinating and compelling place

for me, is the passion of the company, and its people, to apply technology and scientific thinking to major societal issues. Ginni Rometty I am going to get political on you. Because I am the most shallow person in the world, my mission is to see men's formal wear change a little bit. It is too rigid! Everybody looks like a penguin! Steven Cojocaru I was able to get operated on four days after I was diagnosed. It was just a matter of getting this baseball-sized tumor out of me. I reflect now on how lucky I was to be in the situation where I could get the best possible help and treatment. Eric Davis If it's time to party, it's time for hip hop. I love Drake, Jay-Z, Kanye. If I'm chilling at home though, I'm listening to Massive Attack, Thievery Corporation, Radiohead, DJ Shadow. I also listen to a lot of classical. Alexis Knapp Indulging in unrestrained and immoderate laughter is a sign of intemperance, of a want of control over one's emotions, and of...

I think everyone starts in the mailroom at some point! It's a right of passage.

Your boss has to throw something at you and order you around for at least two years. Michael B. Jordan I wouldn't say my mother was my best friend, because that sounds odd, but we have a really tight bond and she is my friend on Facebook. Although she only goes on it to check up on me and sometimes we argue about it. Dionne Bromfield I like to get people talking. I am a provocateur, and I do like getting on Twitter and riling people up. You know what, after a while some sane dialogue and sane conclusions come of that kind of thing. Roseanne Barr They shaved my head, eyebrows. This is not a sci-fi picture. It's not a fantasy picture. You're dealing with something that's supposed to be in reality. But we had a genius makeup artist. Rick Yune So long as peace is not attained by law (so argue the advocates of armaments) the military protection of a country must not be undermined, and until such is the case disarmament is impossible. Ludwig Quidde I grew up, a...

There's nobody who loves being around actors working more than David Mamet, especially actors bringing

his tremendous dialogue to life. I've never seen a movie director who was happier to be directing a movie than Dave. Clark Gregg You could say I'm a character actress. Or maybe a character actress who does peculiar, interesting lead roles. Imelda Staunton Broadband gives small businesses the opportunity to broaden their customer base and reduce their overheads through e-commerce platforms. Hamadoun Toure True security is based on people's welfare - on a thriving economy, on strong public health and education programmes, and on fundamental respect for our common humanity. Development, peace, disarmament, reconciliation and justice are not separate from security; they help to underpin it. Ban Ki-moon We have a company, Geometric Software, which is into engineering services software. We have a company called Nature's Basket, which is into gourmet retailing. Both are specialized companies. Adi Godrej I've been reading a lot of books on history, and watchi...

I believe in breakfast. It's the one meal that my kids usually eat without a

fuss, so that's huge. As for myself, I can't function without it, and I see it as a great way to get some healthy greens in, some coffee, and on a good day, maybe even some news of the world via the newspaper. Samantha Bee There are no more heroes in America. Because of the Internet, heroism has become momentary and within seconds someone who we should be thinking about will be replaced in people's minds with news that Beyonce lip-synched at the inauguration. Tommy Mottola Writing can sometimes be exploitative. I like to take a few steps of remove in order to respect the privacy of the subject. If readers make the link, they have engaged with the poem. John Barton I have always adhered to two principles. The first one is to train hard and get in the best possible physical condition. The second is to forget all about the other fellow until you face him in the ring and the bell sounds for the fight. Rocky Marciano The whole purpose was to say that it doesn't h...

The Microsoft actions announced today are exactly the kinds of industry initiatives we need. Microsoft

is using its resources to bring real privacy protection to Internet users by creating incentives for more websites to provide strong privacy protection. William M. Daley I've always thought that it's good to watch the news to find out what everybody else is looking at and believing, if only because that's how consensus is constructed. Barbara Kruger To a teacher of languages there comes a time when the world is but a place of many words and man appears a mere talking animal not much more wonderful than a parrot. Joseph Conrad When a book raises your spirit, and inspires you with noble and manly thoughts, seek for no other test of its excellence. It is good, and made by a good workman. Jean de la Bruyere I am committed to strengthening our agricultural economy by protecting the unique interests of small and medium size family farms so that they can continue to operate. Sue Kelly It is in self-limitation that a master first shows himself. Johann Wolfgang von G...